The other day, I was considering the role of a submissive wife. Now, I'm not Christian, and I don't follow the Christian precepts of submission. But, I do believe that my husband is the king of my world.
In the past few years, we've struggled, greatly, with our roles. Mainly because I haven't been fulfilling mine, so he doesn't now what role to fill or how. I've noticed that when I have a better idea of what I need from him, what I want from him, and the kind of husband I feel he should be, he finally "gets it." He becomes it. It's not that he's just sitting around waiting for me to define his identity. He's not. But his role as husband directly relates to my perception of his role as husband.
He's his own person, completely. As am I. But, I cannot be a wife by myself. I am only a wife in relation to my husband. We are yin and yang. One cannot exist without the other.
So...my point here is that for me to be happy with my husband's role, I have to know what I want that role to be. What do I want from him? What do I expect? And then I need to figure out what kind of wife that man would need...and become that wife.
He cannot do what he does not know. Therefore, while it is important to verbalize needs and desires, I think it is almost as powerful, if not more so, to create through example. If I want a strong husband, I need to provide opportunities for him to be strong. If I want a loving husband, I need to provide opportunities for him to be loving.
And if I do these things, and help him along with encouragement and natural reward (being the wife he needs and wants), we both benefit.
This is the foundation of a happy marriage.
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